I don’t get up every day thinking about the road rage incident that will inevitably happen when I drive, or how I will snap when my husband doesn’t clean his facial hair out of the bathroom sink. I wake up every day and hope that I will have a good day, with no anxiety, no meltdown, and no screaming fits. Honestly, 9 out of 10 days this just isn’t the case. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a danger to myself or others (these days) I’m just hyper-sensitive and have a hair trigger temper.
I’m getting better. Breathing exercises, meditation, and hypnotherapy are all amazing tools. But it never fails that I’ll walk into work and someone will say or do (or more likely NOT do) something, and my raging bitch comes out in full force. I try not to snap at people or yell or mutter and swear under my breath, but let’s face it, if you are running around and can’t find things because some lazy ass didn’t do their job, chances are I’m going to be pretty snarky about it.
The Flip Side:
Then there are the days I just know…and thank all that is good in the world that I have a prescription for Xanax so I don’t have a meltdown and kill anyone. Everyone around me is cranky and I’m all “La-Di-Da why is everyone so angry today”. Dark days and light days, happy days and sad days, sometimes I’m up, others I’m down.
Awareness and acknowledgment are key. Self-check, are you weepy or homicidal? Sometimes it just helps to know which side of the fence you are on that day.
Depression, anxiety, and hopelessness can be signs that you need outside help. If you do not know how to get help in your area please go to http://www.211.org/